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May 02, 2020 3 min read 17 Comments
We don’t know about y’all, but we will never take restaurants for granted again. The more we have to refill our own drinks and do our own dishes and pick up our own dropped silverware, the more we realize what a treat dining out was.
And that’s just restaurants in general. Everyone knows going to a Mexican restaurant is a whole different ball game. The sights, the sounds, the smells -- it’s an ambiance all its own.
We thought it might be fun (and funny) to attempt duplicating that classic cantina experience at home this Cinco de Mayo.
First and foremost, you’ve gotta dress the part. Sure, you’re only going from one room to another, but why not get in the spirit? It’s not the Cinco celebration you wanted, but it’s the Cinco celebration you’re getting, so put on that Annie Dress and some Mazahua earrings, and really go for it.
Alright, now that you’re dressed and ready to go, let’s turn your kitchen into a cocina in 10 easy steps!
Call someone else who lives in your house. Tell them you’d like to dine there this evening. Then go sit on your porch for 30 minutes before you go to the table. (Optional: Make a trip to the “bar” for a starter cocktail while you wait.)
Put on Pandora’s Mariachi station. When you feel it’s loud enough, turn it up two more notches. (Bonus if you have a Sonos or in-home sound system… then just really go nuts.)
When you get to the table, pour an entire bag of tortilla chips into a bowl. Do the same for a quart of salsa. (Queso, if you’re feeling fancy. Acknowledge, out loud, that you *know* quac costs extra.)
Blend (or shake*) yourself an obscenely large margarita. If you usually prefer no salt, salt the rim. And vice versa. (Remember: We’re getting the full-on busy restaurant vibe here.)
Drink your marg and proceed to eat the entire allotment of chips and salsa for 15 minutes. Then announce what you want for dinner. (Hopefully dinner is already in the works or on its way, but if not, hop up and pop that frozen Amy’s Organic Mexican Casserole Bowl in the microwave.)
If you happen to be of the culinary ability to master fajitas, make sure someone walks through the room with a steaming plate of them. Turn your head and follow them with your eyes until they are out of sight.
Refill both chips and marg. Consume both.
Make an expression of surprise as you set your plate of food down. Verbally warn yourself the plate is hot. Touch it anyway. Declare that you shouldn’t have eaten so many chips, and that you’ll never be able to finish your meal. Finish it anyway.
Moan for 1-2 mins about how full you are. (Bonus points if you say “They’re gonna have to roll me out of here.”)
Put away any leftovers, knowing you’re never going to eat them.
Meander to the couch, get horizontal, put on Bandidas, and succumb to the Mexi-coma.
El fin! Buenos noches y buena suerte!
*P.S. If you’re a little rusty on the homemade margarita, we’ve got you.
Mitch’s “Famous -- Loved By All” Margarita Recipe
2 oz premium tequila
2 oz fresh squeezed lime juice
3/4 Cointreau or Grand Marnier
1/4 cup powdered sugar
Shake vigorously with ice
May 04, 2020
Hilarious! You are spot on Cheryl! Your version took me “straight to the table” and i could taste the marg’s and chips!
May 04, 2020
What a beautiful lady, all dressed from head to toe celebrating a beautiful tradition, and doing it with style and grace! My handsome brown eyed Grand is at Texas Tech and I reminded him to celebrate his heritage! Thank you for a fabulous presentation!
Via Condios! Arlene numero uno Alabama fan!!!!!!!
May 04, 2020
What a beautiful lady, all dressed from head to toe celebrating a beautiful tradition, and doing it with style and grace! My handsome brown eyed Grand is at Texas Tech and I reminded him to celebrate his heritage! Thank you for a fabulous presentation!
Via Condios! Arlene numero uno Alabama fan!!!!!!!
May 04, 2020
Ok .. first did you hear Cheryl’s voice in your head ??? Ok maybe just me
I loved it .. I really needed more food laughes !!!!
May 03, 2020
The Turquoise Birkenstocks and the Headband are my favorite detail. You nailed it. You psyched us up from where I guess shot this in FW — I’m planning big for Taco Tuesday Cinco here.
May 03, 2020
Cheryl you are so cute, I did laugh, Bracken would love it! mom
May 03, 2020
oh my gosh Cheryl, you nailed it 🤣😂🌮🍹🏜💃
May 03, 2020
oh my gosh Cheryl, you nailed it 🤣😂🌮🍹🏜💃
May 03, 2020
Cheryl: thank you for taking your Cinco de Mayo plans to the moon! I had already planned my outfit and where I was going to source my meal of the day. You’ve given me so many more ideas to make it a special day. I hope everybody posts pictures of their celebration! Absolutely can’t stop laughing!
May 03, 2020
Hysterical!!!😆 It’s like you have watched me dine at a Mexican restaurant. Roll me outta here! 😆❤️
May 03, 2020
Thank you for the fabulous wake up today! It got me out of just another day to planning my Cinco de Mayo/taco Tuesday celebration. Turned on Alexa
Linda Ronstat mariachi music. Your blog was so much fun to read and the pictures so fun and creative. Love it! Carry on!
May 03, 2020
Loved this! Now craving Mexican food even more! What a joy this was!
May 03, 2020
Absolutely love this!! Your pics Cheryl are absolutely fabulous! Love and miss y’all! I needed that!!
May 03, 2020
That’s GREAT! Fabulous idea!!! I read it to my husband and he said you were a hoot!
We now have a great plan for Cinco de Maya
🍸🧂🌮 THANKS ❤️DD
May 03, 2020
Cheryl, I started this comment 3 times, had to stop and look/read again, then I had to forward to my BFF in L.A. YOU ARE FREAKIN HILARIOUS! This made it all worth it! I am gonna dress up in my favorite DDR Tee the tunic with the metal wings on back that i have worn so much it is fraying. Please, I beg you to do it again!. I am going order some Huevos from chef Miguel. I am so lucky to have my dear Trudy Collins Cervantes, near so I can add to my DD addiction…as soon as I finally get my stimulus check.🤣😂👍👍👍❤
May 03, 2020
This is fabulous as we’re in quarantined social distancing with our Double D masks on! Suzie
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May 05, 2020
Oh this looks like so much FUN!!! Good on you Cheryl! You made it look real, and that is fabulous!!!